Monday, January 16, 2006

Dave's switched sides

Remember Dave Spart? He's probably still an occasional star of Private Eye's pages.

Dave's M.O. was to qualify every noun ("the er... totally reactionary ....") in furtherance of some position that the pre-Cameron Tories would call 'political correctness gone mad.'

There is often an 'i.e.' in there as well. So, the RUC, for example, would have been "the er... totally reactionary so-called Royal Ulster Constabulary (i.e. Thatchers imperialist bully-boys)..."

Also, every noun was followed by an allegation ("the er... totally reactionary ABCDE, that has yet again show a complete and utter total contempt for er... the black unemployed anti-vivisectionist disabled lesbian vegan anarchists of Hornsey..").

This trait appears to have been transposed onto the libertarian right. Over at Samizdata, one recent post provides an good example. The European Union is renamed "the statist European Union." Dubya becomes "President George Walker Bush (on his watch there has been the biggest increase of government spending since President Johnson and the biggest increase in domestic government spending since President Nixon)"

Further to an allegation about er ..... total censhorship clearly demonstrated by the er ... so called 'technical difficulties' that were used to ... er ... totally censor the Editor of the statist Financial Times because er ... "Bush is a symbol of a symbol of all the BBC hates about the United States (i.e. all the good things in the United States)."

And so on. Read it. It's bonkers.

But, while the idioms are Spartish, the voice isn't quite the same. For example, have a look at another part of the libertarian spectrum, Spiked On-Line.

Read the headlines and try to imagine them being spoken in the voice of a snotty cynical student. Any initiative is a waste of time or a symbol of contempt for humanity. Any fear is irrational. Any social concern is 'hand-wringing'. It's a world dominated by conspiracies.

All governments. All professionals. All institutions.

(And before you say "pots...? kettles? ...." if they had any sense, they'd stick to blaming the Civil Service, pressure groups and Journalists for everything instead. ;-)

Thankfully, they are the backbone of the political right these days - not the left.

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